"When you say 'yes' to others, make sure you are not saying 'no' to yourself."
- Paulo Coelho
Making commitments to our family, friends and co-workers is all part of managing how we spend our time. Sometimes we can find ourselves filling up our calendar with so many commitments to others that we may not leave enough time to take care of our own needs. We may also find ourselves making commitments to others for the wrong reasons. It could be out of guilt or some sense of obligation. Hopefully, we can also recognize when we need to focus on our own wellbeing in order to honor those commitments we are making to others. Prioritizing our self-care benefits everyone, not just ourselves.
We all have different priorities regarding commitments to ourselves and others. It can become a tough balancing act, but having our own wellbeing in check is how we can find the balance required to live life more effortlessly. How are we supposed to be able to take care of our commitments to others if we are not in a good place with our own mental, physical, emotional and Spiritual health? We take care of ourselves so we can take care of others. The better we take care of ourselves, the better our ability to take care of others.
To focus on our own wellbeing is not selfish. It's necessary. It also relates to how willing we are able to love ourselves. Some people struggle with self-love (while others may indulge a bit too much in it). There can be so many contributing factors as to why we may find it hard to make sure we are meeting our own needs. Having some self-awareness around the issue can be very beneficial in this instance. What is it that may prevent us from prioritizing or tending to our own needs? Self-reflection can be a great catalyst in helping us uncover the root of the issue so we can get to work on it.
How much time are you setting aside on your calendar to take care of you? What activities are you doing to help you manage your wellbeing? It's easy to say we don't have the time or the willpower. That's why it's important for us to make the time and the commitment. It may require setting boundaries with others. Our self-care routine reaches far beyond simply helping ourselves. It helps us help everyone, but most importantly, it helps us work on becoming the best version of ourselves we can be.
Healthline: How to Focus on Yourself — and Only Yourself
Psychology Today: Self-Care: 12 Ways to Take Better Care of Yourself