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  • Writer's pictureTommy Cicero

Treating ourselves better

"Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love."

- Brené Brown

Without knowing it, we can become our own worst critic through negative self-talk. By putting ourselves down with our own negative thoughts and phrases we can also become our own worst enemy. Words are powerful. The words we tell ourselves become even more powerful since they are partly responsible for helping us shape our reality. If we are able to recognize just how much control we have over our lives with just thoughts and words, we may choose to be more careful about the thoughts we cling to and the words we speak.

I remember how often I would put myself down before I realized the gravity of all the self-disparaging insults. I was so good at belittling myself, it led to depressive thinking that took me down a dark path. Statements like, "I'm such an idiot," and "I can't catch a break," are examples of how I treated myself. Sure enough, it only made me feel worse. After doing more research to help me address my depression I stumbled upon self-help professional Dr. Wayne Dyer. It was through his work that I learned how crucial our words are in shaping our reality.

When I learned the power of "I am" statements, I realized I was doing myself a huge disservice. I was basically talking myself into a crappy life that I did not enjoy living. I had to learn to reframe my thoughts and treat myself better, with more self-love and especially more positive self-talk. It was awkward at first since I was so used to talking down to myself. Eventually, through more self-reflection and self-awareness, it became easier to do, until it became second nature. I learned first-hand just how powerful our words are.

If we pay more attention to our thought patterns and language throughout the day, we can learn more about the type of life we are setting up for ourselves. Are we lifting ourselves up or putting ourselves down? Are we looking forward to our future or dreading it? If we choose to become our own biggest fan, we learn to choose more empowering words and language that help us to become better versions of ourselves. So instead of being our own worst critic or enemy, we choose to cheer and root ourselves to victory instead.

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