Grounds of Hummingbird Healing Center
One week from today I will be in Iquitos, Peru, preparing for my weeklong Ayahuasca retreat (April 15-21). There are a lot of feelings for me right now: Excitement. Anticipation. Slight apprehension. Curiosity. Gratitude. Mostly, I feel blessed for this opportunity to further heal and grow. I look forward to spending a night in Iquitos, before the hour-long trip to Hummingbird Healing Center the next morning. Next Sunday, the 14th, will be my final day of connection to the outside world until the last day of my retreat on Sunday the 21st. I will have access if needed, but It is recommended to not use our phones or connect to Wi-Fi unless necessary, and I am looking forward to it!
To prepare for a week of no connection to the outside world, I plan on a digital detox for the next week. I will not be on social media or my phone unless necessary (Messaging, weather, health and wellness apps, etc.). Outside of work, I plan in using the internet for health and wellness purposes only. It may be challenging since I'm so used to scrolling through Twitter or viewing clips on YouTube, but l will still be preparing for my trip, so I have plenty to keep me occupied. I'm hoping this digital detox becomes a regular practice to help me disconnect from frequent dopamine dumps that can sometimes overstimulate my internal reward system.
This week starts my (mostly) plant-based diet, where I will mainly be consuming veggies and fruits. I will also be eating organic, free-range eggs to help me get my protein intake until Friday. Saturday and Sunday will be veggies, fruits and water/coconut water (for electrolytes). I also stopped my supplements (protein, creatine, magnesium, cacao, flax, etc.) a few days ago, to rid of any additives those powders may have. My smoothies are strictly water and fruit for the next week. My research tells me the cleaner I eat, especially for the final few days, the less detoxifying/purging will be necessary during my retreat, which can help me get to the good stuff quicker! I did splurge on some sugar yesterday (delicious ice cream cake) at my nephew's Birthday party, but that was my last hurrah until after my retreat. Of all the things I have been abstaining from, I miss sugar the most, more than caffeine, which surprises me. Hence, my giving in to the ice cream cake. And some M&M's. And a cookie. The struggle is real! 😄
What I am most proud of in regard to abstinence, is alcohol and cannabis. I celebrated one year of being alcohol-free last week. I don't miss it or crave it. It will be a long-term thing for me. I'm not saying I will never drink alcohol again, just not any time soon. Cannabis gets easier the longer I abstain. I stopped last April when I stopped alcohol, but gave in last August to help manage anxiety. I stopped again in January, and have been good ever since. The irritability can be tough after a month, but three months later, I'm doing fine without it. I believe my other practices (yoga, breathwork, exercise, eating healthier) help manage anxiety/stress much better, without giving in to the cannabis. I'm not on the long-term plan, like with alcohol, but for now, I'm abstaining. Like sugar, it's one of my favorite treats to indulge in, when it's not for medicinal purposes. I'm committing to not becoming a regular user anymore. I don't need it. I enjoy it, but we will no longer be besties. 😁
Since I have been spending less time consuming entertainment, I have been able to spend more time reading and listening to books. A book I just finished, which was a great primer for my retreat, is Triumph over Trauma, by Dr. Randall Hansen. It provides a brief history of psychedelics, with best practices for use. Then, over two dozen people from all walks of life share their stories of utilizing psychedelics and plant medicine to help heal past trauma. There were several people who had very positive experiences with ayahuasca, which was validating for me. I was also very inspired and encouraged by the healing power of ayahuasca and other psychedelics. I truly believe, in the near-future, these substances will be the go-to medicine to help people heal from trauma and other related mental health issues, like anxiety and depression. I also plan on reading Dr. Randall's follow-up book Heal!, to help with integration post-retreat. The book advocates a wholeistic approach to healing and personal growth through nutrition, exercise/movement, breathwork, nature, Spirituality, and psychedelics.
Dr. Cavnar concisely explains the preparation process for working with Ayahuasca
I have had people ask me if I am prepared/ok with the purging (vomit, bowel movements, crying, etc.) as part of the ceremony. While it may not seem pleasant, I know purging is meant to help clear the way for healing and growth to occur. I may not be looking forward to it, but I welcome anything necessary to maximize the opportunity for healing and growth. Just like plants, I believe we need sunshine and rain to help us grow. It's all part of the process. The key is surrendering to whatever is happening in the moment. I don't plan on resisting or fighting against what occurs during the ceremonies. I will allow Mother Aya to do her thing. I may also incur difficult/challenging revelations. I understand that challenging does not mean bad. Healing and growth sometimes requires us to endure or experience painful truths that allows for the best/most healing and growth possible.
I want to express my gratitude to you for following along as I prepare for my Ayahuasca retreat. These posts have be a great way for me to process and prepare for this magnificent journey I am about to embark upon, and I'm happy and honored to share them with you. I truly believe this has all been happening for me in Divine timing. I did not pan for this. I believe I was called to it, and I am so ready for this experience to help usher me into the next chapters of my life. If you truly want to know why I'm doing this, I will leave you with this song from A Mixtape about Peace & Love I released five years ago, "What I'm Living For."
One more week! 😃